Kane and Richards go to Ontario Place
by Scorpina
Summary: This is a story I came up with when WWE took over Ontario Place, here's what I think would happen if Kane and Stevie Richards were giving the tour of the Amusement Park. hehe
1. Chapter 1

Kane and Richards go to Ontario Place!

Richards: As many of you know, the WWE has taken over Ontario place, however we are going more than just taking over… we are taking control! You read right here people. My good friend Kane and I are here to give ourselves the grand tour… after all we weren't part of the autograph session. Not to mention we couldn't participate in any of the games… right Kane?

Kane: Yeah… well… it's not my fault they make the paddleboats so damn small! I swear I was able to fit in one of those a while ago!

Richards: How long has it been since you were in a paddleboat Kane?

(Kane thinks about it for a moment)

Kane: Well… I remember when I was 14….

Richards: Mystery solved. Any who after breaking most of the boats due to peddling too hard, we were told to give the fans a quick tour of Ontario place. So Kane and I will do just that! We will be testing most of the ride… some we cannot go one since we are too big for them.

Kane: Yeah that mini version of the drop zone really hurt. Why did they make it so small?

Richards: It's for kids Kane… Not for 7 footers… besides your feet didn't go off the ground.

Kane: I said it hurt didn't I? I learned that the hard way. Anyway, we will be going on the rides that we can fit on. Not to mention there's a water park farther ahead so we can cool off after all that work.

Richards: I got my swimming trunks!

Kane: You better… and it better not be the other one you were thinking of wearing!

(Richards has an innocent look on his face with a grin)

Richards: Would I do that to you Kane? I mean really… wearing that in public?

(Kane smirks back)

Kane: Coming from a guy who dressed up as other wrestlers no matter how ridiculous you looked? Please! Well Let's go test out the rides we CAN go on, then we will go to splash works. Not to mention we have a special project we MUST do… top secrete and all.

Richards: Ah yes the top secrete mission, that we do Kane. Now then, let's get this show on the road… TO THE RIDES!

The Thrill Seeker Rides

Kane: Behind me is one of the rides dubbed as a "thrill seeker" for those who many not understand, our terms of thrill seeking is different from another's term. For example, resetting my video game system when I was mire points away from a high score of beating someone's ass would be a thrill seeking task for one person… another would see that as a death wish. Either way, both are considered a thrill. Richards is investigating the ride now… I was unable to go on… (Growls) low bridges… I curse apone thy! However Richards said he would inform me of the results. I on the other hand found a ride I could go on… The Super slide. Call me a sucker for the classics. A good slide is never dull. Not to mention these are a lot longer than some slides I have been on. Most of the ones I have been on is a short, and I get all of 3 inches of sliding before my feet hit the ground… not much fun at all. However I have found that this one was PERFECT! I slide all the way down and it took more than 3 seconds! Slides rule!

(Looks over the edge seeing Richards Cheering as the ride goes through) Well it seems Stevie has had some fun, let's go see how it is shall we?

(Richards comes up to Kane, slightly wet)

Richards: That was fun! Damn I didn't know you could get wet like that! Sweet!

Kane: Any parts that I would enjoy?

Richards: Oh there's lots, I think you can go on it Kane… just watch your head on certain angles.

(The look of curiosity got the better of Kane) Kane: I'll be right back

(Richards watches Kane get on the ride)

Richards: Ok, as Kane is doing that, let's go see some of the other places. I heard they have a maze with lasers and such, so perhaps we can check it out… or the mars Virtual system. However I have to wait first. I'm soaked! However we can wait for Kane, Let's watch him off to the side here!

(Richards looks over the edge seeing Kane on the ride near the middle, Kane gave him the thumbs up just as the ride starts. Richards returns the thumbs up)

Richards: I would recommend this ride for everyone; it's get and all in good fun. However if you are Kane's height I would suggest sitting where he is… in the middle so you know what's coming incase you have to duck.

(Sees the ride coming back near the other side, Kane's grinning at Richards)

Richards: By golly he survived it!

(Kane rejoins Richards.)

Kane: Dude… that was sweet!

Richards: I knew you would like it… how's your neck?

(Kane rubs his neck) "A little cramped… but nothing a good game wouldn't cure!"

Richards: Well they do have bumper boats near by; I think you can go on those Kane… you interested?

Kane: Stevie… any game that can fit me, I'm interested


	2. Chapter 2 bumper Boats & water rides

Bumper boats

Kane: And we are here live at bumper boats! I am going to be waiting my turn like everyone else, Stevie on the other hand managed to get in front of me… How come I always fall for it… 'Look behind you, McMahon is coming!' Second time I did in the past week. Anyway, the game here is almost done. Richards didn't seem to last too long, but that's ok… I'll show him how it's done!

(Richards comes out soaked)

Richards: Man… I lost!

Kane: Yes you did… now let a pro show you how it's done.

Richards: You have an unfair advantage. I mean you're a super heavyweight! You're perfectly balanced on that thing!

(Kane grins) Kane: That is why I am the pro! Watch and learn… watch and learn (Kane gets in and unfortunately has problems putting on the life jacket, however Kane comes up with an idea. He puts on life jacket on one arm, and another on the other arm like water wings)

Richards: Crafty isn't he? The rules state you must wear a life jacket… Kane is wearing one… not they way it's suppose to. But wearing one nonetheless! Let's see what the judges have to say!

(Looking over the lifeguards and game's operator look over Kane wondering if it was all right, given his size they agreed he was ok to ride the ride. He IS wearing a life jacket, therefore is still qualified. Kane hops onto one of the boats with a grin, the whistle is blow and Kane goes on a rampage!)

Richards: OH! Man, that teenager didn't have a chance, already knocked out of his boat by the whistle. Oh, there goes his friend… and the little sister. And look Kane rounding about… No… not the grandmother Kane! Ok I am joking about the grandmother. But Kane is picking these kids and adults off left and right! Eat your heart out Triple H, Cerebral assassin, try Hydro assassin! I'm surprised that thing is still floating, Kane's a big guy don't get me wrong. But still….

(Whistle blew and the game was over, Kane comes out after nearly having to rip off the life jacket, the marks on his arms left by the jacket were still visible.)

Kane: Man, I couldn't feel my arms, it cut the circulation off! They make those things too tight!

Richards: it's for your own safety man! Well since we are semi wet, how about we go on to the next set of rides… the water rides!

(Kane grins) Kane: I'll race you there! (Kane runs off)

Richards: I would never win against him anyway

WATER WORKS!

(Richards standing in his swimming trunks before Hydrofuge for those that don't know it's like one huge toilet bowl you spin around in it and drop out the bottom)

Richards: As you can see we have come to the Hydro part of the park. The water workers better known as to the Canadians and people here Soak City! Kane… I have no idea where he went off to….

Kane: RICHARDS!

(Richards looks up, Kane's on the Hydrofuge wearing his famous red and black swim shorts, jumping into the long tube)

Richards: Well I don't know how this ride is suppose to work….

Kane: CANNONBALL!

(Kane drops out of the long funnel soaking anyone around him… including Stevie. Kane comes out laughing at Stevie being soaked.)

Kane: OH MAN THAT'S SO SWEET!

(Richards turns and glares at Kane)

Richards: Always remember this Kane… Paybacks… Paybacks are a bi…!

(Kane gets out of the water and interrupts Richards)

Kane: Don't worry Richards you will get you chance, any who let's move on… let's go to the other rides… they look like fun! Come on Richards! We are going to go on the Pink and Purple twister. There are a few options with these rides for example you can use a raft that holds about 4 people, or use one of the inflatable tubes the holds only 2. However due to our circumstance… let's see if we go one the water slides… WITHOUT any floating devices! Come on Stevie!

(Richards was dragged to the top of the slide where the lifeguard explained they couldn't go down without a tube.)

Richards: Well for safety reason we cannot go down without a tube, however this proved to be a larger problem then we expected, as before Kane couldn't get into the life jackets…. He can fit one leg in the floating tubes. So we are trying to decide what to do…

Kane: Well I can fit in it... by sitting in one of the holes…

(Richards looks at him oddly)

Richards: Sorry bro, you are going solo on this one!

Kane: Don't worry that's the only way I can go on this thing!

(Kane grabs one of the tubes, he places it near the rushing water and Sits down, the guard gives him the nod to go. Richards gives him a push down.)

Kane: WWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Richards: Well so far so good….

(Sees Kane comes out the bottom no problem waving back showing he made it.

Richards: Well I'll be a butter fingers… he made it! Well as for me… I'm next.

(Down below)

(Kane comes out of the water carrying the raft with him; he places it up on the side and sakes off some of the extra water from the trip)

Kane: Man, that was a GREAT ride. I mean all the twists and turns. Man, I was gonna hurl! Naw I wasn't, but it was a sweet ride. I just wish I could go on it without an inflatable raft. I mean come on! I am not a kid!

(Richards comes screaming down the tube, laughing as he hit the end and skims across the water)

Richards: WOOO that was great!"

Kane: Yeah, well now we need to do the Pink twister…

Richards: Ooo pink.

(Kane laughs) Kane: there is another water park behind us, however we were not able to gain entrances, it's for kids only. We tried to get in earlier however. Ray Mysterio didn't want to help us out and get us pass the gate.

Richards: Talk about a party pooper, I mean come on! He would have been able to get in no problem!

Kane: The lifeguard thought Ray was a man, I mean how many kids do you think go through that are build like Ray huh? Any who the lesson of the matter is… never ask Ray Mysterio to pose as a kid to get into the kid splash area…. Oh sure they get all the cool stuff like the water guns and soakers… it's just not fair.

Richards: Let it go Kane, comes on, let's go on the Pink twister and then we will see what else this place has to offer!


	3. Chapter 3 Out and about

Part 4 Out and About

Kane: Well it's a good thing I remembered to bring a dry pair of clothing… Richards… well… he didn't

(Focus is on Richards who is wearing a large t-shirt and oversized shorts that look like pants)

Richards: Do you always bring extra clothing of extra cloths?

Kane: Well incase of an emergency… why not? Anyway we have much more to explore… come on! I heard of this place called the atom blaster….

At the Atom blaster.

Richards: Kane… when you said atom blaster. I thought more along the lines of a roller coaster…. Not throwing foam balls at kids.

(Kane smirk)

Kane: Yeah I thought the same thing… but hell. It's fun!

(Kane gets hit in the head with a foam ball)

Kane: Oh you are so mine! (Throws it back hitting the kid that got him)

Richards: Is there any other places to see? I heard there was a basketball court…

Kane: OH YEAH! Come on; let's go check it out!

At the Cool Hoops.

Kane: Well we found the basketball court. Ah that takes me back a while. Shooting hoops and all. I was pretty good if I say so myself. But alas wrestling became my calling, it happened to me… it happened to the Undertaker… damn, who knew wrestling had such a Syrian song to lure those from a sport they grew up with, to something they never considered….

Richards: HEAD'S UP KANE!

(Richards chest passes Kane the ball accidentally getting him right in the stomach when he wasn't paying attention. Kane folds over as he tries to regain his wind)

Richards: Oh crap….

(Kane turns and glares at Richards)

Kane: I take a moment to be serious… and you nail me with a basketball! For crying out loud!

Richards: Hey man, I'm sorry I thought you were looking. I guess you weren't…

(Kane grabs the basketball and nails Richards in the back)

Kane: let's move on shall we?

(As they walk through the park they see a large gong near the food court. They walk over and see)

Richards: You think we can play with it?

(Kane pulls back the large wooden striker and pushes it as hard as he can making the symbol Gong)

Kane: Hm, I guess it doesn't make the Undertaker appear if that's what people are thing.

(Richards laughs)

Richards: Hehe, good one Kane. But that would be cool for the Deadman, have an actual gong!

Kane: Then the people who are sitting the closest to it will go deaf instantly!

Richards: Point taken, well since we are here, and I accidentally hurt you with the basketball, how about lunch? My treat?

Kane: Sounds fair to me. The cuisine of Ontario Place… not a bad ring to it huh?

Richards: My ears are ringing from the gong.

Kane: WHAT?

Richards: I SAID MY EARS ARE RINGING!

Kane: WHAT?

(Richards notes the smirk on Kane's face and knew Kane was toying with him then and there)

Richards: Come on Kane; let's get some lunch….


	4. Chapter 4 The food court

FOOD COURT

Kane: Mmmm, the food court. Now being the professional athletes that we are. Richards and I know the importance of keeping a well balanced diet, even when on the road we have to try to eat healthy, Guilty as charge when I say I have taken out fast food one more than on occasion….

(Richards comes back with a large selection of food)

Kane: Uh… Stevie… what's all of this?

Richards: Well I took a bit of food from each place so we can see how it is, Oh man you got to try theses. Edge told me all about them!

(Richards passes Kane a pastry likes object. Kane looks at unsurely)

Richards: It's called a beaver tail, and they are SO good! Try it!

(Kane takes a bit, his eyes widened)

Kane: Mmmm! Delicious! Why is it called a beaver tail?

Richards: I don't know, perhaps a Canadian thing to rival the Belgium waffles?

Kane: Well these things are pretty good! I like them! Let's see we have New York Fries here as well… I had them before, good fries! But why have New York Fries in Canada huh?

Richards: Why do we have Tim Hortans in The states?

(Kane ponders for a moment)

Kane: Good point Stevie. Well since we have already been swimming, we can eat all we want! I'm so hungry, after lunch we will head on to our secrete mission… yes… the mission.

Richards: We need all the strength we can get to pull this one off! Are you ready Kane?

(Kane Grins as he holds onto his bag)

Kane: Stevie… I was born ready for this!


	5. Chapter 5 Mission Impossible End

Mission Possible.

Kane: I am standing now before the Cinesphere here at Ontario place. I have seen some large movie screens in my time… however this one takes the cake! This is the LARGEST screen in Toronto… with 24,000 watts of sound… oh man… this is enough to make the most hardcore of gamers drool with passion at the sight of their favorite game on this bad momma. That's our mission… we get in. we play one round of Halo, we get out. Simple as that… Now. We have to be sure to have our survival packs.

(Kane takes off his backpack and reveals the contents inside)

Kane: One X-box with full adaptor and outlet, one Halo game. 2 bottles of Pepsi, three bags of chips, my personal stash of candy bars, 2 controllers, one memory card, and of course a backpack to carry it all in. Now… let's see if we can pull this off…

(Kane opens the door and walks through the halls; he walks into the room that has all the seats and the large screen. Kane makes a sign of a cross)

Kane: Sweet mother of systems and video game councils, the holy grail of all screens for any video gamer to play apone thy sacred system. I'm in heaven!

(The PA system comes on)

Richards: Kane, what took you so long!

(Kane looks up to the projection booth. Richards opens the window and waves)

Kane: How the hell did you get up there?

Richards: The security guard. He's the projectionist here and said since there were no more shows I can play video games up here, he has it hooked up and everything!

(Kane stands there in utter confusion)

Kane: All this planning was for nothing?

Richards: Are you going to get your red ass up here or not!

(Kane shrugs)

Kane: Well I guess I can't complain for it being this easy…

Later.

Richards: We have been here for about an hour now… Kane has handed me my ass on a platter when playing Halo… but it's ok… We are playing on a HUGE SCREEN! Not to mention…. (In a whisper) I really have to go to the bathroom!

Kane: Yeah well that's the thing, if you're a hardcore gamer and in the middle of a level… there's no time to pause… that has been your downfall!

Richards: It's not my fault, you could have brought cans of Pepsi instead of the 2 Liter bottles!

(Kane pauses the game)

Kane: Do I look like someone that would need just a can of Pepsi?

(Richards shakes his head no)

Kane: Didn't think so…

(The sounds of the game pulses through the walls as the feel like you are in the action. Kane smiles a happy grin)

Kane: I'm so happy!

Richards: Well that's our tour of Ontario Place, tomorrow we will be going around Toronto and see what they have to offer!

Kane: Stevie… I thought we were coming back tomorrow?

Richards: Who said that?

Kane: Well Hunter wants to challenge me in bumper boats; he's getting the other guys to join in… I mean we have to accept!

(Richards gives Kane a strange look)

Richards: WE! Kane… why am I not told these things?

Kane: I just told you now man, we'll be back tomorrow!

Richards: I don't know how he does it, but he always seems to get me into trouble!

(Someone comes in through the door)

Security guard: Excuse me… what the hell are you 2 doing here?

(Kane and Stevie look at one another then back at the guard)

Kane: Sound testing, we have to test the sound and picture on the screen before the next show. As crazy as this might be…

Security guard: Uh huh. Then why is there a bottle of Pepsi all over the place and wrappers?

Richards: We have to stay here for a while… I mean we have to be very consistent on this check. We are so professional on this; I haven't even taken a bathroom break!

(The security guards doesn't buy it)

Guard: Ok who are you really?

Kane: We are here with the WWE superstars… I'm Kane, that's Stevie Richards; we were told it was ok to play video games here.

Guard: Really? Kane and Stevie Richards! Why didn't you say so! My son is a HUGE fan of your Kane!

(Richards clears his throat)

Richards: What about me?

(Guard glares at him)

Guard: Yeah you're that Right to Censor guy Taker beat up, and Kane lay laid out too! Oh that as beautiful!

(Kane smirks)

Kane: We are almost done, we promise to clean up afterwards….

Guard: Hey no problem, can I get your autograph for my kid? He would kill me if I didn't. You know how kids are.

Kane: Not a problem

(Kane picks up one of the paper advertising the WWE, he signs it and hands it to the guard)

Guard: Thank you so much.. have fun!

(the guard leaves, Kane smirks down at Richards)

Richards: No fair, you get all the attention!

Kane: it's not my fault I'm popular. I try to be bad you know… I can't help being loved! Well that's all for today guys. We'll be back tomorrow to show Evolution a thing or 2 about bumper boats!

Richards: I sure hope you got more than just me helping you!

(Kane grins)

Kane: Oh you'll see soon enough. Well that's all for us, remember to check out Ontario place, and we'll see you at Summerslam!

THE END


End file.
